When I sat down to write this article, I was reflecting on the week’s overarching theme and how it relates to today’s discussion:
Open to receiving (ask). This week is bringing us an opportunity to learn how to give, with the shadow of dependence and the light of graciousness.
As I thought about that, I realized how critical our needs are in everyday life and how often we fall into patterns of self-sacrifice. Today’s energy really speaks towards balancing our needs while allowing others to support us.
Why don’t we allow others to support us more often?
Here’s what I’ve heard in the past.
- I was always taught that it’s better to give than receive.
- If you ask someone for something, then you owe them and I don’t want to owe anyone anything.
- I feel ashamed to ask for help. I shouldn’t need it, I should be able to do it myself.
- I don’t like relying on other people (they won’t come through for me as I come through for them).
- If you want it done right, you have to do it yourself (they will just half-a** it because it isn’t important to them)
- I don’t want to be a burden.
- I can do it myself, I don’t need anyone to do it for me.
- No one can help me. (No one, not even me, knows how to help me). Note: Often there’s a massive sense of helplessness underneath this statement and they feel beyond the ability to receive help. [See yesterday’s blog on Codependency and the damsel archetype for more information.]
No matter what your belief is, there is an inherent need to balance our heart charka, which comes with being open to both give and receive.
Typically we will lean toward one or the other due to our dualistic thinking nature, but we must remember that those are two sides of the extremes and there is a wide range of options in between the two that we can experiment with.
If you are over-giving or sacrificing your needs in order to provide for others, there is often a sense of resentment or a void that doesn’t ever seem to be filled, no matter what you attempt to give in order to fill it.
If you are experiencing this then the Soul Transformation Program would be tremendously helpful. The Soul Transformation Program’s goal is to assist you in discovering where these behaviors manifest in your life and guide you toward a more balanced approach, breaking the cycles while healing the root cause. It is far easier to work through our behaviors with the aid of another, so your ability to receive and give to yourself starts here (with a little grace).